POTASSIUM, JOURNALISM AND COLONOSCOPIES

At 05:30 my poodles woke me. They can tell time perfectly and it was time to get me up. I fired up the computer and opened Chrome where I was greeted by items on Google News perfectly suited to my interests and preferences. Items with no scientific basis that were highly prejudicial, unverified, illiterate and divisive. There were items on “silicon valley” having absolutely nothing to do with the culture of the silicon technology. There were “technology” items having nothing at all to do with technology but everything to do with gaming tripe and “mobile computing”. The Google algorithms were having a field day cornering the least competent news items possible. Although in the defense of Google there is probably not much competent reporting to pick from since journalism went extinct along with Edward R. Murrow and his like.

However, there was one article having to do with the benefits of potassium gained from eating avocado and spinach and its positive effects on arterial clog that caught my attention. It, as usual, was based on a single experience with limited statistics and was extrapolated (but less than a light-year) from data taken from a population of mice and vaguely linked to benefits in people by the “journalist”. AHA. Since I was hungry from my early morning sleep interruption I thought immediately about the California Bacon Eggs Benedict at the “Black Bear Diner” which features tomatoes in addition to avocado and spinach. I got out my text books on calculus, differential equations, orthogonal functions and quantum mechanics and with a liberal application of the principles of Kentucky Windage ascertained that the Black Bear Benedict would have a somewhat positive effect after the avocado and spinach outweighed the Hollandaise Sauce, Eggs, Bacon, Hash Browned Potatoes and English Muffin. The fruit cup which is part of the deal couldn’t be all bad either.

I ran right down and consumed one of these things. I left the bear tracks on the plate. I also had three cups of coffee which has an effect on me somewhat more profound than drinking the gallon of driveway cleaner that happens the night before a colonoscopy. I ran right back home to get on the computer to relate my morning observations (and to visit the porcelain). I hope you benefit from them and enjoy them. Butch

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